How I Met My Abusive (ex) Boyfriend

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  • Published on:  Friday, September 7, 2018
  • Thank you for watching and hearing my story. Check my pinned comment in the comment section below for more information about me/my experience. Click "Show More" for some helpful links.

    All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Names have been changed and do not represent actual people.

    ▶GET HELP!
    https://www.thehotline.org/ - FREE live chat, 24/7 call services, OVER 200 LANGUAGES
    https://www.loveisrespect.org/ - FREE live chat, 24/7 call services
    https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ - FREE live chat, 24/7 call services
    https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/ - FREE chat only in Arizona, nationwide 24/7 call services
    https://www.betterhelp.com/ - NOT SPONSORED - online, personal counseling services

    ▶GET EDUCATED!
    https://www.joinonelove.org/ - LEARN MORE about abusive relationships
    https://www.loveisrespect.org/ - “RELATIONSHIPS 101” - LGBTQ+ inclusive
    https://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/ - “IS THIS ABUSE?” - helpful guide

    “6 Types of Child Abuse” by Psych2Go: https://fapgem.com/video/vRkKPMXXN8M/video.html
    “Abuse Story” by storybooth: https://fapgem.com/video/SiKQDu2cNvU/video.html
    “Bad Boyfriend” by storybooth: https://fapgem.com/video/_vFqzpENZO0/video.html

    ▶GET OUT THERE AND HELP!
    http://stoprelationshipabuse.org/
    https://www.joinonelove.org/take-action/
    https://www.childhelp.org/donate/#step-one

    ▶I USE:
    - ToonBoom Harmony Premium - to animate
    - Blue Yeti microphone - to record
    - Premiere CC - to edit audio and video
    - Cintiq 16 Pro screen tablet - to draw (but I recommend basic cheap pen tablets from Wacom)

    ▶STAY CONNECTED:
    https://instagram.com/illymation
    https://twitter.com/illymation
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Comment

  • illymation
    illymation  4 months ago +26340

    ⬇️ *IF YOU HAVE A QUESTION I PROBABLY ANSWERED IT HERE* ⬇️
    Hey guys! Thank you for making it through that video and hearing my story on this. Considering this content and the kind of awful people it can attract, I wanna start something good in my comments section with your help! *If you see a comment that’s super kind, helpful, anything awesome, comment on that comment with a heart ❤️ emoji.* That way, youtube will push it to the top. If enough people give love to one another, maybe we can drown out the hate. 😄
    I expect there will be a lot of valid questions. A lot of those I can assure you I’ll get to in the next videos. But here are some answers for now.
    *Why did you make this video? It’s [insert your opinion here]*
    If I have a platform, if I have a voice, if people are watching and listening to me, I want to use this channel to highlight the things I wish I knew to avoid when I was your age. I want to warn others against awful people like the guy in this video. Know the red flags. Listen to your friends and family. It really can happen to anyone.
    *“Why wait? Quit cliffhanging! Tell us everything!”*
    This is already a 10 minute video that took over a month to do! I’m also in college full time. I reaaaallly wanted to do a tell-all, believe me. There’s just so much to tell, and I am ITCHING to get this done.
    *“Why didn’t you go to the police?”*
    1. You can’t call the cops on someone being mean to you on the internet.
    2. *I did!* (I’ll get into that in the next video) but understand, I, the detective, my lawyer, we all need to be able to prove who sent the messages. The messages themselves aren’t enough. If brought to court, he could argue “oh my sister sent that not me” and... we can’t prove otherwise. And if you don’t believe this, idk what to tell you. I went to the police and this is what they told me.
    3. *We tried* proving otherwise by getting his confession, and he denied it all of course. He never thought he did anything wrong in the first place.
    4. Even though he coerced me into sending pictures, I could still go to jail for “soliciting” CP. Again, we can’t prove HE coerced me. But we can prove that’s me who sent them. “WAIT THATS NOT FAIR—!” Yup. Even though I was coerced, I was pressured, I was threatened... I did something that can be proven, and he did something that can’t be proven. So going to court could possibly get ME jailed. This is what people mean when they say “the system protects criminals.” 🙃
    *”Why didn’t you include the messages where [this this that that whatever]”*
    I just don’t have the messages. Here’s the approximate breakdown of our conversation history:
    - 80% Skype
    - Of that 80%, half was talking out loud (therefore no paper trail)
    - Blocking people on Skype in 2015 deletes your conversation history. I know there’s a way to mine it out of your computer somehow, but I didn’t know this back then, and I no longer own that computer.
    - 10% texting (This happened in 2015. It is 2018. I’ve gone through 2 new phones, one of which was stolen fml)
    - 10% other - google hangouts, Facebook, tumblr, etc.
    *”This happens to men/boys too.”*
    Yeah, and water is wet. Me talking about my experiences doesn’t negate others. *The only story I can tell is my own.* Why would I talk about someone else, or I guess pretend to be a boy and tell this story, if that’s what you want? I don’t know that experience or how it feels. I only know mine, and that’s why I shared it. The links I’ve provided are inclusive of all people and children, and some show breakdowns by gender. *If you’re concerned about other people and their stories, PLEASE go find them and support them.* Don’t sit in my comments section telling me to do that. They obviously need YOUR help if you want to give that. *Claiming I’m “ignoring” others by just telling my story is ignorant and a waste of the kind heart you claim to have.*
    *“Did he do anything worse?”*
    Unfortunately yes. Statutory r***. And I went to the police about it. We tried getting security camera footage but the place where it happened didn’t have cameras installed until a year after the incident took place. All we could try to pin him on was coercion to entice, but again, we couldn’t get him to confess. So, he got away with it.
    *”you’re lying / you’re doing this for attention / this is fake / that’s photoshopped / if this really happened you’d / etc”*
    Did you know 2% of American adults think the Earth is flat? With a population of 326,766,748, that’s 6.5 million dumbasses walking amongst us. With numbers like that, who am I to expect anyone watching this video to believe anything concrete?
    After getting out of this relationship, I was diagnosed with major depression, anxiety, I’ve struggled with self harm since being with him and I am prone to relapsing, and I have had symptoms of PTSD (recurring vivid nightmares, flashbacks, irrational fears). Making this video put me in an awful place mentally for a month or so, which I anticipated and dealt with along the way. I do not have the emotional energy or even a care in the world to “debate” you in the comment section. But go off, more comments actually benefits my channel. (Thanks for your support! 😊😊😊😊)
    Thank you guys so much and let me know if you’d like to see part two or something a little more light hearted.

    • Dino Girl
      Dino Girl  18 days ago

      I know how you feel! I went through a very similar experience. Sending lots of love and good vibes your way ❤❤❤❤❤

    • Moneyshot
      Moneyshot  20 days ago

      Why don't you give us his full name, adress and phone number?

    • TNS ModSPIN Unhinged
      TNS ModSPIN Unhinged  a months ago

      Can you explain why this is in my recommended? It’s okay I don’t mind.

    • nef nef
      nef nef  1 months ago

      I am 12 and here and 3 years i got stuck with art.. Its that normal T^T ??I animated many storys but i feel i am weird.. ppl say i am art freak..:( its true..?

    • Sienna Rhodes xxx
      Sienna Rhodes xxx  2 months ago

      illymation OMG I love you and your vids. I'm so sorry this happened to you xx

  • Just a Happy Canadian-American Boy

    I watched the Austin Jones pedo scandal and this video apear in my recomended hahaha😂

  • Omotomilola Adefila

    okay, i'm NOT siding with the guy or saying what you went through wasn't bad. having someone send you bad texts is very traumatic. but i'm just curious as to why you paint yourself as the clueless child and not him. in reality he is a child too by law and is 4 years older than you. it is not exactly the ultimate pedophile experience. again, i am not supporting the creepy teen. i'm just saying there are victims out there who have gone through worse.

  • Buck, Collin, Chip

    Welp if YouTube wants me to hear this imma tell my story about my abusive bird

  • Austin Wigley
    Austin Wigley  2 hours ago

    Well, that was fucked up. Thanks for the recommendation, Youtube. Guess I'm going to watch all this and have nightmares now. You deserved better than this, OP. Thank you for sharing.

  • Buck, Collin, Chip

    Why does YouTube want me to watch this

  • Soggy Napkin
    Soggy Napkin  2 hours ago

    Hey Illy, I'm having a problem with some guy "going too far." Not sure if you will even see this, but I'm not sure how to tell him to stop. I'm really worried that it will get to far, I wanna say something before it gets to far any advice?
    Edit: hey! Don't touch me there that is my no no square! R.A.P.E that is a felony!
    (He touched me in my no no square)
    *uses humor to hide insecurities*

  • Arkeido
    Arkeido  2 hours ago

    You're exaggerating. If the person's not at least 10 years older than you, just shut up. It's not a big deal.

  • Heather Leonard
    Heather Leonard  2 hours ago

    *THANK YOU* for posting this and literally drawing a picture about abuse. It means more than you know, coming from someone who has also been in an abusive relationship.

  • Chelse Sstroudd
    Chelse Sstroudd  2 hours ago

    Glad this popped up in my recommended. This happens way too often, and I don't hear about it much. I know a few people that have or are in a situation similar to this. Thank you, illymation for posting this series. We need more attention to be brought to this subject!

  • Marie Dejeux
    Marie Dejeux  2 hours ago

    I used to have an abusive boyfriend(ex) just like yours, glad to watch this.

  • R1b
    R1b  2 hours ago +1

    calling a 17 year old dating a 13 year old is not a pedophile, and i wouldnt even say a hebephile. its two teens. the moment one isnt a teen is the problem. not saying he wasnt shitty, just that you shouldnt throw around the word pedophile like that

  • Zombieknifefight
    Zombieknifefight  3 hours ago

    Youtube wouldn't stop reccommending this, but honestly, now that i've seen it, I like your art ((No foolies)). So I'mma browse ya channel, and you, interesting person you, might have a new sub~!
    ((sorry, sleep deprived, kinda bored))

  • DandiiBunii
    DandiiBunii  3 hours ago

    You're brave for bringing this up, well done.
    One of my biggest regrets was falling predator to something like this. I hope you continue to recover well, I'm sorry this happened to you.

  • Argentinian Shitposter

    youtube please for the love of god.... i dont really care

  • Mary Flores
    Mary Flores  3 hours ago

    THIS. was incredible WOW.

  • Justin :P
    Justin :P  4 hours ago

    Oh shit, this video was intense man, also the animation was amazing. Keep up the less lighthearted vids, its like a horror movie. Also like damn man I feel so bad for you.

  • simplysacrifice x
    simplysacrifice x  4 hours ago

    I know I couldn’t relate to what you or anyone else has been through, but I’m really touched by this video, like, a lot. I wouldn’t know how it would’ve felt, but by hearing what has been said, I may have some sort of understanding. Frankly, I really appreciate hearing your story– so much so. I feel like I have so much to say– but I don’t really know how to say it. Anyway, thank you.

  • 99ЖDefect
    99ЖDefect  4 hours ago

    Ok youtube has been sending me this shit for a long time now and even though I don't want to have nothing to do with this, here I am watching it.
    First of all, he's not a pedophile. He's just a bored sad sack of shit that knows younger girls are more probable to be gullible than adults and more likely to give the attention he so desperatly desires. I've seen this exact same case happen with a girl friend of mine and I even saw through her ex's behavior and advised the two of them to just cut off ties because this is a far cry from a healthy relationship.
    What I see in this video may be grooming, it may be psychological torture, but the "devil's advocate" is right. Just telling an adult about it before it escalates to "the point of no return" would be more than enough. The longer it takes, the harder it gets. And you both were in the wrong. Him for being a piece of shit and you for enabling him. End of story.

    • LavaLeaf
      LavaLeaf  2 hours ago

      Dude watching it is only gonna have her videos pop up more in your suggested

    • 99ЖDefect
      99ЖDefect  4 hours ago

      Now that I finally addressed this... please youtube, let me fucking go somewhere else...

  • joe schmoe
    joe schmoe  4 hours ago

    So did they smash? I'm not gonna the whole video